Hard Edge Page 12
The bike roared to life. Caden climbed on and hunched down low to grip the handlebars. He pulled onto the track.
I stood to watch with his three friends. The first couple laps seemed extremely fast to me but Tanner explained the slow pace. “He’s putting around to warm up the tires . . . and himself,” Tanner added with a laugh. “You two grew up together? I guess you were a friend of his brother’s too.”
“Yes, Grady and I were best friends. We were all really close.”
Tanner shook his head. “Terrible tragedy.”
“I’m still finding it hard to believe.”
“He’s favoring the left leg,” Danny noted as we watched Caden pick up speed and take the curves at a sharp angle.
I stood in awe watching as Caden leaned the bike so that it was nearly parallel to the ground as he rounded a curve. “How does he keep from falling over?”
“Good balance, good traction and some great skill,” Tanner said. “Caden is a natural. I remember the first time he tried out one of our racing bikes. My dad and I nearly dropped over in shock as we watched him handle a Yamaha 500 as if he’d ridden it a thousand times.”
“Growing up he was extremely athletic. He was always one of those kids who was good at everything, riding BMX, surfing, skateboarding. He just had this incredible sense of balance. And he was fearless,” I laughed. “To a fault sometimes.”
Danny looked over at Tanner. He seemed to be the man out there to analyze and keep track of the ride. “Looks like he’s hesitating some on the right curves.”
“Can you blame him?” Tanner asked. “I know he lost a lot of his muscle mass on the right leg. It takes a long time to build that back.” Tanner turned his conversation back toward me. “That break was about the messiest damn fracture I’ve ever seen. But he had a great team of doctors, and with his own dauntless determination, he was back up and walking a lot faster than most. He was sure he’d be able get back to racing, but the medical team advised completely against it. Caden was devastated.”
I gazed out at the track. The sunlight glinted off Caden’s helmet and the shiny bike as he roared along the track. I could only imagine what a setback it had been for him to be told he wouldn’t race again.
Greg pulled his focus from the track to join the conversation. “I don’t know, watching him right now, like he was born on that new, unfamiliar bike, I think those doctors made an awfully hasty decision. With the right training and if he can get a few of those sticky cobwebs, the ones that still hold memories of the crash, out of his head, I think he could gain back that edge he had. We all saw his potential, like he was put on this earth to race superbikes.”
The topic was one that made my heart soar for Caden, while, at the same time, filling it with fear. And not just because of the inherent danger in racing motorcycles. The pro racers spent most of their lives out on the road, traveling through cool places like Italy and France. And, more importantly, they were surrounded by gorgeous, rich people, like bathing suit models and women who sent pictures of their expensive boob jobs. There would be no room in Caden’s life for a hometown, nerdy girl like me. That thought made my shoulders sink. Suddenly, the bright, sunny day seemed a little gloomier.
I wanted more than anything for Caden to be happy, like he was right now, flying at frightening speeds around a race track. But I saw no space in his happiness for someone like me. He was meant for much bigger, more exotic things.
We watched Caden finish the practice run and then I plopped back onto my chair, feeling much less light on my feet, and sucked my water bottle dry as the men talked in motorcycle Greek again. And all the while, I watched Caden. He was a different person. His white smile flashed bright enough to light up the shade under the easy-up. I’d never seen him so excited. The determined set of his jaw, the sparkle in his incredible eyes and the way he carried himself, as if he was ready to burst out of his own skin at the thought of racing again, made it clear that he wanted this. We already had so many things against us, against a permanent relationship. This would be one more barrier to cross. We were both heading in such different directions, it was hard to see how we could ever come together in the middle.
I forced a smile as Caden walked toward me. His long hair was smoothed back with sweat. The smile hadn’t left his face.
He leaned down and kissed me. “I’m so fucking pumped right now, Trinket.”
“I see that. It’s fun seeing you this happy.”
He turned back to continue the conversation with his friends. I took a deep, steadying breath trying my hardest not to show my heartbreak.
Chapter 21
Caden
I stopped my mouth to look over at a very quiet Kenna. “Holy shit, I’ve been rambling on like an excited kid who just found a dinosaur bone in his backyard. You should have told me to shut up, Trinket.”
She laughed at my analogy. “Why would I do that when you look so darn cute in your state of giddiness? Although, I have to say, giddy is not a word I ever expected to use to describe you. I love that you’re so excited about your ride, Cade. And I especially love that you are acting like a kid who just found a dinosaur bone in his yard. I’m glad you came out here today.”
“I am too. Thanks for talking me into it.” I drummed a quick beat on my steering wheel to release some excited energy. “What do you think? Does it sound fucking crazy for me to get back into it? I was told I wouldn’t be competitive again because of my leg.” I patted my right thigh. “Hurts a little. But I think with a good trainer to help me build it back up so that it’s as strong as my left—” I laughed. “Shit, I’m doing it again. Change of topics. I’m starved.”
Kenna sighed. “Thank goodness. I’m ready to take off my sandal and start gnawing on it like jerky.”
“There’s a great burger stand just a few miles from here. And they’ve got chocolate shakes.”
“Perfect.”
I’d left the track with my head in the clouds and my feet ten inches off the ground, imagining myself back on a bike and racing. But as some of the adrenaline faded away, it occurred to me that Kenna was not her usual self.
“I hope you weren’t too bored sitting out there all morning.”
“Not at all. It was fun to watch. Scary. But fun. By the way, I don’t know if you should mention this ride to your dad.”
“Yep, that’s probably a good idea.” I glanced over at her. “You haven’t told me your opinion, Trinket. I need to hear what you think.”
“I think hamburgers and shakes sound good.”
“Kenna, you know what I’m asking.” And then it hit me. I was as thick as a fucking brick wall, especially when my mind was wrapped up in motorcycles and racing. “I know I’d have to travel a lot, but—”
She turned to look at me. “Don’t you dare make any decision based on how it would affect me, Cade. I couldn’t live with that. I couldn’t be happy knowing that you didn’t follow your dream because of me. This whole thing started so unexpectedly, and we never gave much thought to how any of this would work. We both have lived very separate and different lives up until now. This relationship couldn’t be more convoluted and twisted if we tucked it inside a darn pretzel. And yes, I realize how silly it sounds to compare us to a pretzel, but I’m obviously hungry.” She pointed through the windshield at the hamburger stand in the distance. “I get unreasonable and weepy and nothing seems plausible when I have low blood sugar. Let’s not talk about this right now.”
I didn’t know how to respond, but what I did know was that I’d probably say the wrong thing. Kenna was right. We’d twisted ourselves up good.
I turned the truck off the freeway. The smell of grilled onions filled the cab. Kenna took a deep breath. “See, I’m already feeling more human just breathing in the scent of food.” She relaxed back. “I’m sorry. I’ve just put a big, old cloud over your mood. I wa
s trying hard to mask my feelings, but they were too strong for my poker face. And since I’m really bad at poker, I don’t think I had a great one to begin with.”
“You’re right though, some food will help us think straight. There has to be a way to make this all work. We just have to piece together all the parts. I’m going to tell you right now, Trinket, I’m not going to give up on what we started. I’ve been waiting too damn long for it.”
Chapter 22
Caden
Full stomachs had helped lighten our moods for the rest of the drive home. Almost as soon as we walked into the beach house, Tanner had called me to talk about the day again. He sounded just as excited as I felt about the prospect of me racing again. But the ride home had reminded me that nothing in my life would be complete without Kenna. I’d finally found my way back to the girl I loved, and I didn’t want my career or anything else to get in the way of that.
Kenna had taken the rest of her wine bottle out to the lounges to watch the sunset. I finished talking to Tanner and headed out to join her. She didn’t look up when I slid open the screen door.
She was sitting on the end of the lounge sipping her wine. I straddled it behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist. I pushed her hair aside and kissed the back of her neck.
She giggled and hunched her shoulders up. “That tickles.”
“Should I stop?”
“No, I like it.”
I kissed her neck again and slid my hands beneath her shirt. “Trinket, I want you as part of my life no matter what happens from this point on. You have to be. You can finish school, and I can figure out my own direction. Somewhere, somehow, we need to find a way to make it all work.”
Kenna rested back against me. “I feel the same way. I’ve always felt so in control of my life. I knew exactly what I was going to do. I was feeling pretty damn solid, but somewhere along the way, the ground beneath my feet softened. And now—now there’s you. Like a lightning bolt I never saw coming.”
She placed her wine on the ground and turned around to face me. “It’s a complication, an awesome complication, I wasn’t expecting, and one that has made me rethink everything.”
I couldn’t stop myself from reaching up to touch her face. It was impossible not to touch her when she was close. Her eyes closed at the feel of my hand.
“Let’s figure out a way to make it uncomplicated, Trinket. Because, at the end of it all, the only thing I know for sure is that you are right here.” I touched my chest. “You’ve been there forever, and I don’t ever see that changing for me.”
Kenna took hold of my hand and traced her finger along the lines on my palm. “Wish I was a fortune teller. Then I could see how all this turns out. Or maybe I don’t want to know.” She lifted her gaze to me. She pressed her hand against her chest. “You’ve always been here for me too. But—”
“Uh oh, that’s not a word that should follow. But what?”
She shook her head.
“Tell me, Kenna.”
Her eyes were glassy as she looked at me again. “We were both in a really vulnerable state when we started this. As right as it seems, I worry that it’s fragile, and it’s all going to break apart.”
I took hold of her face and kissed her hard.
“There’s not a fucking fragile thing about it, Kenna. It will only break apart if we let it happen. I want you. That’s all I fucking know.” I stood up and climbed off the lounge to head back inside.
She followed me inside and grabbed my hand. “It’s what I want too, Cade.”
She wrapped her arms around my neck and jumped into my arms, wrapping her legs around my waist. We kissed as I carried her down the hallway to the bedroom.
I pushed the door open with my foot and marched to the bed. I lowered her onto the mattress. My fingers pulled impatiently at the button on her shorts. I had her naked in seconds.I pushed my pants off, climbed onto the bed and pulled her beneath me. I cradled her face in my hands and kissed her as I pushed inside of her. She moaned softly against my mouth as my cock filled her.
She opened her eyes and peered up at me as I rocked against her.
“You belong with me, Kenna. It’s all I fucking know.”
Chapter 23
Kenna
I turned my head and set my gaze on the man sleeping next to me. The morning sun highlighted him perfectly, showing the strong lines of his handsome face accented by the highly enviable dark lashes.
We’d spent the rest of the night in each other’s arms and everything about it felt permanent and right. But morning light always brought bittersweet reality and clear thinking. I was ridiculously addicted to clear thinking. I didn’t know how to change, but for once, I wished I could just stay clouded in my thoughts and my judgment. Logic sure had a way of screwing up happiness. Especially for me.
I tried to get up quietly, but Caden stirred in his sleep. Then, without opening his eyes, he grabbed my hand. “You do not have permission to leave this bed, honey bunch.”
“I’m in the mood for pancakes, and they aren’t going to make themselves.”
He opened his eyes. “Pancakes? Why didn’t you say so?” He waved toward the bedroom door. “Carry on. I like mine with lots of butter.”
He watched as I pulled on my clothes. I decided not to bring up any of it for now, the racing, my law school, the future of our relationship. For once, I was just going to let things flow in their natural direction. To hell with logic and reasoning. We’d be back in Mayfair today, and we had more time to spend together. For now, that was enough. Life had a way of working out or not working out. I would wait to see what happened next.
Caden got up on his elbows. “What time do you need to get back to Mayfair?”
“After breakfast, if that works for you.”
“It doesn’t. I want to stay here. In bed. With you. Preferably naked.”
“As lovely as that sounds, I’ve got to go home and pack truffles.”
He groaned in disapproval as he sat up to get dressed.
I headed out to the kitchen to get the pancakes started. I found a big mixing bowl and pulled out the pancake mix and two eggs. My mom had sent me some rather terse, business style texts, which meant she was still not pleased about me spending time at the beach with Caden. I was not looking forward to being stuck in her truffle factory packing chocolates while she grilled me and tossed her unnecessary advice my way.
I picked up my phone and texted her that I’d be home in two hours. Then I turned to the stove to heat up the griddle. Caden walked out just as there was a knock on the front door.
He opened it, and a beautiful girl came flying into his arms. “Cade, I’m so sorry. I heard about your brother, and—” She tried to kiss him, but he pulled his face back.
“Mindy, I thought you were in Europe.”
“I was but I got bored because you never showed up. Then I heard about your brother.” I stepped out from the kitchen. Caden’s guest noticed me for the first time. Her perfectly bow shaped lips formed an O and then she smiled. “Oh my gosh, I should have called first.” She looked at Caden with a raised brow. “What was I thinking? I should have known you wouldn’t be alone.” She left Caden’s embrace and walked toward me with her outstretched hand, a million dollar smile and the most flawless skin I’d ever seen. “I’m Mindy. I’m so sorry to have intruded on your morning.”
“No need to apologize. I’m Kenna. Nice to meet you.”
Mindy’s gaze turned to the kitchen. “Pancakes?” she asked enthusiastically.
“Yes, please stay. I was just about to start breakfast.” I flashed a smile Caden’s direction. He looked less than thrilled about the prospect of a pancake threesome. I should have been jealous and upset, but it would have been a waste of energy. The beautiful, friendly Mindy was easy to like, and I wasn’t going to star
t kidding myself. I knew Caden had plenty of women in his life. He’d certainly had no shortage of girlfriends when we were growing up in Mayfair, and the adult Caden was even more irresistible than the teenage version.
So it was settled that there would be a guest for breakfast. Like the perfect hostess, I set Mindy up with a glass of orange juice and a cup of coffee, and tried my damndest not to catalog her many incredible attributes and compare them to my less than spectacular counterparts.
Mindy walked out to the chaise lounges with her morning drinks, stretched out her unbelievable, perfectly shaven legs and began a long string of phone calls.
Caden came into the kitchen to help. He walked up behind, wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck. “You didn’t have to invite her.”
“Yes, I did. She just came back early from Europe because she was bored. Apparently, because you didn’t join her there.”
“Kenna—”
I spun around with an egg perched on my hand. “I’m not upset, Cade. Really. Other than the fact that she makes me feel like a troll when I’m standing in the same room with her, she seems very nice.”
He pulled me against him, and the egg dropped to the floor. He ignored the mess he caused. “Troll, my ass. Mindy’s got nothing on you, Trinket.”
A short laugh shot from my mouth. “Don’t even go there, Cade, because it just sounds silly. She is gorgeous.” I rubbed my fingers along his beard stubble. “You didn’t just land on this planet a week ago. I know you had a life, and I’m sure that life had plenty of close acquaintances. So you don’t have to say any more about it.”
He gazed at me with that look of admiration that I was getting so used to, I wasn’t sure what I’d do if it ever faded. “Could you be any more fucking perfect?”